The Senate Campaign of former WWE CEO/Diva Linda McMahon is more fun than a C Street party. It's just the gift that keeps giving. In case you've missed out on the previous entertainment, here are my two past postings on her.
Questions About Linda McMahon's Senate Campaign
Linda McMahon's Senate Campaign Provides More Comedy Gold
Now, I've found out that "Superstar Billy Graham," a former pro wrestler has been making some allegations about her that add to the comedic value of her GOP Senate campaign. From the Hartford Courant 11/18/09:
"She may look like a Sunday school teacher," Graham said, but he insists nothing could be further from the truth. "Linda McMahon's hands are as bloody as her husband's because she is aware of every move in the ring," he said.
That quote is hysterical. This is the image I get of a Sunday school run by former WWE CEO Linda McMahon.
1) The little girls would all have breast implants.
2) The little boys would hit each other with garbage cans and slam each other into precut tables.
3) The baby Jesus would have his own Titantron with death metal music.
4) The image of the "Virgin" Mary would be with her in a thong.
Graham actually makes potentially legitimate criticisms, but I had to go with the snark first. (I am only human after all.)
Superstar Billy Graham is speaking out against the woman he says made millions from the violence, sexual exploitation, blood and excesses of professional wrestling. What outrages him particularly, he says, are recent attempts to sanitize the wrestling mega-enterprise whose sexy women wrestlers once performed in "lingerie matches" and were still posing nude in Playboy as recently as 2008. He views this toning down as a huge act of hypocrisy — an attempt to graft a family-friendly face onto a business that has been anything but.
This reminds me of one of the funnier WWE storylines ever: they had a long running gag about an elderly woman who was a nymphomaniac. I thought she was totally cool, but I don't think GOP primary voters would.
I have to admit that I don't think the WWE's simulated necrophilia angle is so funny. Anyway, back to the news story about Gralahm
He still accepts the adulation of rabid fans, but the praise for the wrestling legend came at a price — six hip replacements and five hip dislocations he attributes to taking massive amounts of steroids that built his body to super-human proportions and allowed him to bench-press 600 pounds. Graham is lucky to be alive after receiving a liver transplant that he needed, he said, because he contracted hepatitis C from the blood of another wrestler.
Graham is furious about having no pension and no continuing health care from his wrestling career, an anger that fuels his campaign against McMahon's candidacy.
This is an unusual example of a common problem: lifelong workplace injuries and a lack of universal healthcare in this country. We may not be able to relate to being a
Graham also talks about some changes that were made in the WWE product before her Senate campaign started.
First, in a sport where bleeding was once commonplace, blood has been virtually banished from the ring. Graham said he cut himself with a razor blade 300 to 400 times in his decadeslong career. Said Graham: "She has had no problem with grown men — myself included — cutting their head with a razor blade. All of a sudden, why aren't these guys bleeding anymore? Because Linda is running for the Senate."
The second major change, he said, is that the attractive female wrestlers who have posed nude in Playboy magazine in the past are suddenly no longer posing.
Third, wrestling no longer features "bra and panty matches," in which female wrestlers would strip each other down to their undergarments. "You might as well put a pole in the ring and let them dance around like in a club," Graham said.
Another Republican who is a sanctimonious hypocrite? Oh my.
Photo: Linda McMahon for Senate